My hubby & I have been teaching 2nd grade CCD, which any Catholics out there know means. FIRST COMMUNION. My hubby would agree, it’s been mostly me with him stepping in when I was absolutely exhausted or sick, etc. We celebrated their first communion at the vigil Mass tonight. Two girls and four boys dressed in their best to receive Jesus’s body and blood for the first time. Six little souls finally getting to experience becoming one with Jesus. It was beautiful. What was more beautiful was that this is not their last communion. They will go to Mass again…maybe tomorrow, maybe sometime during the week, but for sure next weekend – either Saturday evening or sometime on Sunday they will go to Mass and they will become one with Jesus. They will have the opportunity to become one with Jesus in the Holy Eucharist AT LEAST once a week for the rest of their lives (more if they choose to attend any weekday Masses). That is incredibly amazing and beautiful. As I was sitting in Mass tonight, and Father was reminding them that this is just the beginning and the one thing better than their first communion is their second, and the one thing better than their second is their third, etc…I started thinking about sex.
Bear with me and don’t start thinking dirty. Aside from receiving the Eucharist; the body, blood, soul, and divinity of Christ; where else do we see two becoming one? In the marital act. A husband and wife having sex (with each other) physically expresses the union of their souls. They become one and, God-willing, participate in the creation of a brand new, unique, soul. Sex is also similar to communion in that the second time is better than the first, and so on. I did have sex on the brain (vaguely) before going to Mass. I am contemplating and praying about applying for a job as a monthly columnist for a blog I follow. They are looking for a columnist for (among other things) a sex & intimacy column. It just jumped off the page at me. I can talk about sex. I can tell you what’s worked in my marriage and what hasn’t. I have a pretty good imagination, too. 😉 I could be a sex columnist…as long as I’m not just writing about sex because sex is so much more than just sex. Thinking about this column and what I would write up to send in as my audition piece has me thinking about so much more. Why don’t we talk about sex more? I’m being serious. Why don’t we talk about good sex, by which I mean sex within a marriage that is GOOD. We talk about the Theology of the Body. We tell our youth that sex is beautiful and fun and God wants us to have good sex, when we are married (all good things to teach) but then, once we get married, we stop talking about sex. We shouldn’t just be telling our youth and single folks how awesome sex can be (should be) once you are married, we should also be helping married couples have amazing and beautiful sex!! We do the same thing with first communion…we put so much emphasis on the first part and forget about the communion. We need on-going catechsis to help enrich, strengthen, and glorify the spiritual unity with Jesus that happens during communion (so the 1,387th communion truly is better than the first) and we need to quit being shy about helping married couples enjoy a physical unity that allows their 1,387th physical communion to be better than not only their first but also their 1,386th.
That is what I would hope my sex & intimacy column would help accomplish. We need to take sex back from our overly sexed, unmarried, super secular, using, worldly culture. Just because they have all the needed parts required to have sex doesn’t mean they are having sex. I believe married couples should be having such mind-boggling sex that they scoff at all those “sex ends when you get married jokes”. Mind-boggling sex? You think it’s impossible? Ha. You don’t know what’s happening then. You don’t have a proper understanding of sex. To boggle one’s mind means that there is something much greater than physical intimacy…there is emotional, spiritual, and psychological intimacy as well. I venture to say that if we were able to help married couples grow closer in every other way within their marriage then they would have to try very hard to not have mind-boggling sex.